Los Angeles, CA -- The post-Nipplegate political climate is leaving shock jocks like Howard Stern speechless, but a former teacher in Los Angeles may be able to help.

Phil Eisenhower has just written a book, "Vicious Vocabulary" (Random House Reference), that features more than 850 fancy-shmancy words that are on the SATs and make perfect insults.

He figures shock jocks who read it will learn words that will allow them to talk about the same puerile topics as always without offending the Federal Communications Commission.

For instance, calling someone "concupiscent" sounds a lot classier than just saying they are horny, and a word like "excrementious" can slip by the censors easier than "crap" or "sh*t."

Eisenhower knows what he's talking about. As a teacher, he once prevented a controversy by convincing a writer for his school's literary journal to substitute the word "priapic" for "semen-stained" in a poem.

Solve puzzles and create your dream aquarium! Search through a dazzling trip down memory lane.

More Weird News From 2004-03-04 The day's offbeat stories from around the world. • Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs • Flash Lites: Rip 'N' Read Pop Culture Recap • 'Mummy' Ride Construction To Wrap Up In June • Spotting Landmarks In 'The Sopranos' • Makeover Mavens Tackle Fashion Disasters Of Protestant Vicar • 'Mr. Show' Mastermind Hosts Midnight Movies • Don't Know Much About Video Game History • Disc Jockeys Uncover Christ Curse • Marriage With An Asterisk • Life Of Crime Becoming Viable Career Move For Youths • Vocabulary Expert Can Help Shock Jocks Save Their Jobs   « Current Weird News Stories